Take a moment. Think about a time when you chose to spend time together with someone who was going through something really hard.
Now imagine them coming to you and saying, “Hey, I know you were trying to help, and I really appreciate you trying to support me, but when you said [something that seemed helpful], it actually really hurt.”
Most of us don’t have the opportunity to heal that hurt, because most people won’t bring it up. It’s a stain on the relationship forever.
That’s not good. And it wasn’t at all our intention. But good intentions don’t always lead to positive impact.
The good news is: learning to navigate these tricky situations is a learnable skill. Not a lot of effort yields significant results. Perfect? No. Substantially better? Yes!
Much like CPR, the best time to learn it was before you needed it.
The second best time is now … before you need it again.
the impact:
With approximately 2 million new cancer diagnoses in the US every year, that’s 10s of millions of people affected.
(That’s patients and all the people they come in contact with—friends, family, coworkers, etc.)
Where do the support people go for guidance? Maybe a friend? Mostly just power through and do their best.
Patients canfeel more isolated than supported .. and most only talk about it with other patients who “get it.”
We may not be able to fix the physical or the financial, but we can work consistent small wonders in the social and emotional.
Because we want to be helpful,not just feel helpful.
